April 25, 2005
Brooks and Dunn
Well, last Thursday night we went to see Brooks and Dunn at the Cajundome.
Wow. They can put on a show.
We were on the second row and really, really enjoyed ourselves. I caught a guitar pick that Gary Alan threw out and Candice caught one of Kix Brooks' guitar picks.
They played "Only in America" and the crowd was on it's feet, but they went ballistic when three Marines marched out on stage...you could barely hear the music over the yelling. At the end of the song they shot these tubes full of red, white, and blue streamers all over the place, then these fans started blowing the same sort of confetti all over the place...it was in a word, INCREDIBLE.
April 19, 2005
Whoever said a garage sale is a great way to make extra money needs to take a lesson in economics. We haven't even had the sale yet and the amount of time that has gone into it already has our dollar per hour return down below $1.00. The work, frustration, and just crud that goes along with a garage sale makes it not worth it...BIG TIME. After our last one, I swore to Candice that I would not be involved with another one ever again. Well, guess who has to pick up the tables, set them up, move them out early Saturday morning loaded with items, help set up, help clean up, take the tables down and return them, setup and take down the clothes hanging devices, and finally buy dinner several nights this week as well as Saturday because there is not any time to do any cooking. Oh yeah, did I mention patience being worn to a frazzle because of the emotional energy expended on this venture? Now, someone explain to me how this is worth it again....
Take my garage sale, please...
April 18, 2005
Lawn customer lines
I've been handing out flyers, doorhangers and just flat meeting folks to bring on more customers for our lawn care business. Here are a few of the complaints(for lack of a better word) I hear when I give them a quote.
"Gosh, that's more than I used to pay my son to do it"
"Do you really think that's fair" (I just want to say, "No, I really take advantage of every 10th customer and today is your lucky day")
"Since you have commercial equipment, shouldn't you only do lawncare commercially?"...uh, yeah, how silly of me.
"You can't mow on Friday afternoons, I won't be here" -So what? Are you going to help me mow?
And my favorite so far:
"Don't you do any yards for free?"
This young lady writes into our radio station about a "dilemma" she has. Her boyfriend proposed to her, she said yes, and he gave her a cubic zarconia until he has enough saved to buy her the real thing. She asks our resident Dear Abby what to tell her friends, she's so worried about what people will think because it's not real.
Hey fella, run away. She is telling you everything you need to know right there. You mistook this lady for someone that has a heart.
By the way, that's what Abby said, too.
April 15, 2005
A friend of mine down here just sent me this. I must share these, they are FUNNY!
The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin ,
Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000
sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over
them with rollerblades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than
200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor
is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman
underwear and a Superman cape. It ! is strong enough, however, if tied to
a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan
is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball
up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a
baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh",
it's already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock
a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract
of a 4-year old Boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming! pool
you still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject "PB &J" sandwiches even though TV
commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on;
plastic toys do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a
5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox
and brake fluid.
25.) Women will pass this on to almost all of their
friends, with or without kids.
Now, get back to work.
We take Reader's Digest and the moment it comes in my boys are fighting for it. They love to read the jokes and the "Drama in Real Life" articles. Well, Stephen walks into the living room and there is Jane Beth looking at the Reader's Digest. He turns to Candice and here is the exchange:
Stephen- Is she supposed to be looking at Reader's Digest?
Candice- No, she isn't, some of those women are showing to much...I don't want her seeing all that just yet.
Stephen- Give me the Reader's Digest, Jane Beth.
Jane Beth- You can't look at it either, I saw some women in here that are showing too much!
Stephen- Jane Beth, I only read it for the jokes and the stories.
I'm still laughing about it...
April 14, 2005
Festival International de Louisiane
This is one of the coolest things about living down here. This festival is a excellent family affair. We take the kids and go eat, listen to all manner of music artists, and see everybody in the Lafayette area there. Last year was our first time and we enjoyed it so much that we set aside some money specifically for the Festival this year. They bring in music groups from all over the world....really a great time.
So, just in case you don't have any plans, you should think about coming down for this. It is awesome! It takes place April 20th to April 24th.
Here's the link to the website:
April 13, 2005
Need a ride?
So, I'm on my way to work this morning and I see the hazard lights on a vehicle up ahead. I pull over and it's a guy that is on his way to work and some bolt came out of his crankshaft pulley and the truck won't go vroom vroom anymore. So, I tell him to climb in and I'll take him where he needs to go. Here's the conversation:
Me- So, where do you need to go?
Him- Uh...know where TA truckstop is?
Him- Can you take me der? My mom is fixin to leave with a load on her way to a rig down below Cameron. Mom drives hotshot ya see.
Him- I can't believe that truck left me on the side of the road again. I thought I had it fixed last time that bolt come out. I put some loctite on it, can't imagine how it come loose. I just bought another engine for my Ranger though, only cost me $400...engine and transmission. Hope it works...the guy looked pretty honest. Hey, you want to know how to make some extra money? I know a guaranteed way.
Me- Would you mind giving me a call once you have a working truck?
Hope that wasn't too rude....
April 10, 2005
I love watching sports, and the Masters is one of those events my whole family will watch. Today, we were rooting for Chris DiMarco. He darn near pulled it off. Candice said something about "He deserved to win". I know what she means, you see someone come so close, they are married, 3 kids, good guy....you want them to win. That's not the way it works though. The competitor(generally) that performs better is the one that wins. There is always luck involved, sometimes good and bad, but that affects all competitors and pretty much averages out. As a soccer referree, you have to fight this urge to try and help those that may have gotten a "bad break" or "bad luck" or whatever. Well, you can't do it. Things tend to even themselves out, and I told Candice that. DiMarco had opportunities, Tiger had opportunities. Tiger capitalized, ultimately, when he needed to more than DiMarco did. It is always very good to see the sportsmanship that is shown in this sport. I wish other sports would follow golf's example.
I take my hat off to Tiger Woods on his 4th Green Jacket. That is no small accomplishment. Did ya'll see that chip-in on #16? That ball was crawling toward the hole. My wife and I were actually leaning towards the television...wanting it to fall. I've never seen a ball hang as long as that one did. That was really cool.
April 08, 2005
If you haven't yet, buy "The Notebook" and watch it with your husband or wife. This could possibly be the best love story ever that has become a movie.
April 07, 2005
A woman President?
By now you know that I listen to pretty much one radio station all the time. The djs are always asking questions to stir up phone calls and occasionally I can't stand it and have to add my 2 cents.
Well, the other day, somebody said something about Hillary Clinton and Condoleezza Rice running against each other for President in 2008. They then asked the question what everyone thought about a woman being President. Someone made a comment about not wanting a woman President(it was a man, yes) and the phones lit up. Well, I couldn't stand it. I figured I had to set them straight. So, I called in and said that as long as there were able bodied men, we don't need a woman to be President. Sheesh! Talk about opening the floodgates. Right off the bat, this woman calls in and says, "Send that man back to the cave! Women make decisions everyday and can certainly do the job!" A few more calls like that followed until this one lady called in and said that she never wanted to see a woman as President. She stated that a woman is not set up emotionally to handle the sort of decisions the President has to make and then live with, but men are.
Wow. That was really a big statement. It got me to thinking. Can you imagine being the husband of the woman that was President of the United States? Seriously....that would really, really, be hard. Can you imagine how often she'd come "home" upset about a bad day at work? I mean look at what happens to the President everyday: Political cartoons, late night television jokes, so many people criticizing every decision you make, drop everything you're doing and fly around the world for a summit or funeral of a world leader, taking "vacations" to Camp David that always include armed guards and daily briefings on what is going on, having someone else always decide your schedule, having reporters shout questions at you that you'd rather not answer, having to send young men(and now young women) into harm's way knowing some of them will never return...and so on and so on. That would be just about the most unhappy man in the world, y'know?
Just my mind chasing rabbits....
Pasta? maybe not...
Nothing ruins a lunch quicker then sitting down to eat it only to hear some of your patients in the room next to you hurling in a garbage can...oops, I mean the floor.
Want to guess who cleaned it up?
April 06, 2005
Radio call in shows
This must be the year of the "Call into the radio show and win" for me. I called in to 97.3 the Dawg on Monday and one a six-pack of beer! How cool is that?
See, don't you Monroe people wish your radio stations would give out such prizes? Move down here.
I realize it's no shame to be poor, but it's no great honor either.
April 02, 2005
"Well pilgrim, it looks like you've done gone and got yourself surrounded"
I'm putting something in the fireproof safe and my wife asks me, "What if the key burns up?"
I never considered that.
April 01, 2005
Pray for the Pope
The Pontiff's health is deteriorating rapidly. Those close to him are preparing for his passing and he has taken Last Rites. Whether you're Catholic or not(and I'm not), please pray for God's Will to be done with this and if it be His Will, for him to recover.